Posts tagged london

Where Harry Met Meghan

 Now happily married and parents to baby Archie, following a modern fairy tale wedding, Where exactly did Harry and Meghan’s love affair begin? Well we know a matchmaker essentially introduced them, whether an official matchmaker, or well-meaning friend playing Cupid has not been revealed.

 But where does a Prince of England take his future Monarch on a first date?

Clearly Harry took into account, his Hollywood actress date was part of a hip-crowd. And where do the who’s who in entertainment mix with aristocracy?

 Soho House group, are renowned for providing a private environment for the who’s who in the creative industries to network, dine and party in comfort and style.

 Harry’s choice of house was Dean Street townhouse. The club is compromised of a pair of Georgian residences, built in the early 17thcentury.

With aristocratic beginnings, homing King Charles II’s mistress at one point.

In 1928, Socialite aristocrat David Tennant founded a club well known as a hang out of politicians, intellectuals, artists and those famed in the entertainment world.

Good conversational point for a monarch and an actress.

And quite fitting given the blend of their backgrounds.

 Soho Dean Street definitely has a very traditional British Feel. 

Still very closely linked to the arts, I personally attended one of their life drawing classes.

They met for a drink rather than a formal sit down dinner.

Which is more relaxed than you might expect for a royal date.

 However anyone who has observed Harry over the years, can see, he is very easy-going, and even down-to-earth.

 For anyone else visiting, you firstly need to be a member to get through the door, or at least have a friend who is a member that invites you.

Drinks can be brought over to your table, if you are fortunate enough to grab one.

 Evenings are pretty packed as you might expect in bustling Soho.

Drinks off the menu include a ‘ British Classics’ selection 

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 English Milk Punch, mixed with Mount Gay Black Barrel, Remy Martin, Somerset Cider Brandy 10yo, arack, milk, pineapple spice mix, oolong tea, citrus, aromatics.

Bramble Bombay Sapphire, Blackberries, Lemon.

Fizz selection 

French 75

Bombay Sapphire, Lemon, Champagne.

 As well as a wide selection of  spirits, wine and champagne..

Harry could have even gone for a Draught Pint, to appear especially non-pretentious.

 Who knows what they sipped on, but we do know they hit if off.

 "We met for a drink," said Markle, "and then I think very quickly into that we said, 'Well what are we doing tomorrow? We should meet again.'’ So for those who think playing it cool and waiting at least a week before meeting again, or a few days to follow up on a date. Take a leaf out of Harry and Meghan’s book, take down the guard, and keep the momentum going.

The couple went on a second date and Prince Harry then invited Markle to accompany him on a trip to Africa just three or four weeks later. "I managed to persuade her to come and join me in Botswana and we camped out with each other under the stars," he said, describing the whirlwind romance. "Then we were really by ourselves, which was crucial to me to make sure that we had a chance to get to know each other."

 What did Meghan wear for her first date?

Well it was revealed, stitched into her wedding dress, was a piece of blue fabric. Following the tradition of wearing something blue on your wedding day. And its not just anything blue, she chose to stitch a piece of the fabric from the dress she wore on her first date with harry. So there we have it, its not just a little black dress that works, but a little blue dress too.

  Siobhan Copland

siobhan@cupidinthecity.com

 

Dating success in 2019

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The new year marks the perfect time to start over and set goals in your life.

If you're single and stuck in a rut, dating coach Siobhan Copland says there's no better excuse than the beginning of 2018 to really take stock of your love life and de-clutter.

The professional matchmaker advises the best way to ring in the new year is to refocus your approach to achieve a healthier and romantic life.

But that means taking action and following several key steps including dumping the 'friend with benefits' who is draining your energy. 

Siobhan, who launched her own dating company Match Me Cupid in 2009, told FEMAIL why being selective when choosing a partner is not a failing but will help lead to a successful relationship: 'You're better off satisfying yourself until you find someone who is fully on your wavelength.' 

If you've been seeing someone casually it's time to cut them off and find someone who is willing to be available to all your needs not just sex

DUMP THE FRIEND WITH BENEFITS 

Seeing someone casually who 'fulfils certain needs' is a big no-no according to Siobhan, she says it's time to cut out the energy zapper.  

'When they’re not available at your beck and call, it becomes frustrating and could well be getting in the way of you being fully emotionally available when the right one comes along. 

'Best to leave that arrangement in 2017, and wait for the full package,' she said.

'Sex after all is also an exchange of energy, be picky with who you share your energy with.'

Go out and experience meeting people in person, that way you're not hiding behind online dating apps

FOLLOW A THREE DATE RULE

Before dating apps, people would get to know someone over a period of time giving a chance to get to know someones personality fully before making a call on whether they are right.

First date nerves are real, and you should make a call once you can see a person is relaxed with you.

Plus people always put on a bit of a show first date, but by the third you can usually see consistency in their character.

With todays fast paced dating landscape people are quick to jump back on the app after one date to see if anything better else is out there.

If you find someone physically attractive, and you didn’t have a mind numbingly boring time, give that person at least three dates to get to see them in different circumstances, and a chance for romance to develop. i.e First date could be a drink, second date could be an activity, and third date you could even offer them over for dinner or a take away. It also means you won’t be asking all the questions you want to know all on one date, which can make a person uncomfortable and like being interviewed, it will feel more natural, allowing them to reveal themselves over the course of dates.

STREAMLINE YOUR ONLINE DATING  

Siobhan also advises against spreading yourself too thin, instead if you are using online dating apps to stick to just one and improve your profile. 

'There is such a thing as app fatigue. Pick one app where you feel you can find your tribe. And keep your profile short and sweet.

Ask your friends to set you up on a blind date or seek the help of a matchmaking service to find a new partner

'Think of three things you would like to find in common with someone, and include it in your bio. Steer away from saying what you don’t want.' 

She says asking your friends for help in picking the right photos; but encourages women to wear a dress with heels and men should opt for a blazer and jeans to attract matches.  

GO ON A BLIND DATE

Siobhan says that your friends can be key to meeting someone, so ask them to set you up with a friend of a friend or even join a matchmaking service and get someone to do the hard work for you.

'Many successful relationships have developed as a result of having a blind date, like on the programme!

'They get to know a few things about a person before picking their date. You could have your own at home version, get your friends to line up a few prospects, and pick the one you most like the sound of.'

( As featured in the Daily Mail online)

How to meet people

I’m often asked this question, Where do I go to meet people? That may seem like a perfectly reasonable question coming from someone who lives in a remote village someone in the highlands. But living in a monster city like London, jam packed full of over 8 million people, you’d be lucky to find a spot, where you can be in solitude. Despite being crammed into tubes, and buses daily with people intimately close by no fault of their own, sat opposite each other for long journeys, avoiding eye contact at all costs, instead choosing to bury our heads in the daily free paper, or a round of angry birds. We miss or more accurately avoid opportunities to ‘ meet’ people every day.
The only conversations with strangers we have are often alcohol induced, rather than human curiosity. Ever since childhood we’ve been taught not to speak to strangers, and for some its as much as a fear, as public speaking or as daunting as attempting a mariah carey cover at Karaoke.

In reality, working in London during rush hour, we see thousands of people every day, yet how often do we make new connections? Rarely.

Even the ‘old fashioned’ ones who refuse to go down modern methods such as internet dating to form new connections, preferring to meet the love of their life while at the deli counter in Waitrose, take no proactive action. Life is not a romcom, most handsome, confident men, don’t come up and ask whats in your basket, and they’re certainly not mind readers, so without a signal, they’ll just keep shopping!

I met my first love on the tube, it did feel a bit like love at first sight, eyes met across the carriage, and all, but to be fair, I would never have approached him, as I felt too shy, and he hesitated too.
Fortunately I had a ‘ matchmaker’ friend present, who didn’t hesitate at all, to race up to him, telling him I fancied him (much to my embarrassment at the time) but had she not taken the initiative we’d have both missed out on a great romance!

Living in a city you have the advantage that people are out every day of the week, spilling out of restaurants, pubs, bars, galleries, parks, libraries, the tube, everywhere, the only thing coming in-between you and them is Fear.

And there is nothing to fear but fear itself.

So think of a good ice-breaker and break the habit of not speaking to strangers!

I’ll be posting a video shortly with some more tips on how to approach strangers, and get a positive response!

Dating Etiquette Tips

(As featured in Female First Magazine)

he days of courting may seem to be a thing of the past, in today's fast paced dating world. However we needn’t forget our manners when it comes to dating behavior, here are my top 10 dating dos and don’ts.

Keep the conversation future focused

Be on time. One of the most common peeves for people when dating is poor time keeping. It's important to show that you value the other person's time as much as you value your own. Slackness when it comes to keeping to the arranged time, sets the tone for the date. If you leave your date to get a head start at the bar, while waiting for you, don’t be surprised if they head for the door, sooner rather than later. Many people have a limit on how long they are prepared to wait, before calling it quits. If you are going to be running behind, beyond your control, communicate your ETA in advance, along with your apology.

Plan a time to meet, which gives you more than enough time, taking potential transport delays into account, and date night is not the time to agree to overtime at work.

Put your phone away. What did we do before mobile phones? We had uninterrupted conversations. The best compliment you can give your date is your undivided attention. Taking calls, texting, snap chatting, instagraming that all can wait until you have alone time. If you wouldn’t do it during an interview, then it’s not date appropriate either. Even if your meal looks picture worthy.

Don’t clock watch. Unless you’re worried about the clock striking and your carriage turning into a pumpkin, watching the time appears rude. As does double booking your evening. If you’re looking for an escape route to cut your date short, simply cut the date short if you need to, and say you better be getting home as you have a super early start. Dashing off to meet friends because you've made other plans, will leave your date feeling a little robbed of time, and not much of a priority.  The least you can do is keep the evening free. Even if you are super popular, and spreading yourself thin. If you want a relationship, you need to show you are willing to make space for one first, not just squeezing one in.

Pay your date compliments on their appearance. A small compliment goes a long way, after all they will want to feel that they are attractive, and conscious of making a good impression. They may have spent considerable time and effort on wearing the right outfit, and grooming in preparation for meeting you. And if they compliment you, it is polite to thank them, and return a compliment. Anything from remarking on the colour they are wearing to complimenting them on their hair looking good, the smartness of their attire to simply saying, they look nice.

Which leads to, make an effort with you appearance, including grooming and keeping good personal hygiene.  Bad breath, body odors, and unkempt hair are not reasons why you want to be remembered. So ensure you arrive, looking and smelling fresh. Avoid eating smelly food if going for dinner, and if you're a smoker, and your date is not, try not to smoke while on the date, if you must, ask if they mind, and carry chewing gum and fragrance to remove the odour. Particularly if you are hoping for a kiss.

Be interested in them. Going back to giving them your undivided attention, ask questions which show you are interested in getting to know more about their likes and dislikes so you can find commonality. When asked questions, answer in detail, but find a way to bring the conversation back to them, people like people who show an interest in them, and who are open about themselves. Without telling them their whole life story, give them enough of an insight to leave them wanting to get to know you more.

Avoid talking about previous or upcoming dates. Particularly speaking about previous dates and exes, in a derogatory manner. Mocking others you have dated, only makes you appear insulting, and plants the seed, that they may well be the butt of future jokes.

If asked about previous relationships, keep the explanation brief, and allude to the fact you are not one to dwell on the past and are feeling positive about meeting the right partner now.

Don’t ask ‘ why are you single?’ It’s the most irritating question any single person gets asked, and suggests that something must be wrong with them. It doesn’t give you any more of a connection, even if you both answer the same. There are far more interesting ways you can find common ground. It's not like they are going to be getting references from exes. So why ask?

Follow up after the date, and check they got home safe.

Whether you think you’ve found the one of not, they have still given you their valuable time, which should be respected and acknowledged. Thanking them for their time, and checking they arrived home safe is the courteous thing to do. If you want to see them again, suggest meeting up another time. If you’re sure there is not prospect for romance. It’s better to be clear, rather than leave things hanging in the air.

Meet up a second time to be sure. In the days of choosing a partner through a quick swipe, it can be easy to quickly write someone off. But if you found them somewhat attractive, and had a good time in their company, but perhaps didn’t feel fireworks, consider meeting up a second time. This will help you to get to know them some more when there are less nerves, and perhaps in a different environment, where you may well see a different side to them. If a relationship is what you are after, it can take time to develop, so have patience with the process. Great relationships are built, not bought.